saltinourstars: icon by mapsincolor (Eleven)
[personal profile] saltinourstars
Boom

It could be his heart.

Boom

It could be his breath.

Boom

It could be his feet hitting the ground. Or the ball. Or the crowd.

FUKURODANI 33 - KARASUNO 31

That's it.

Planting hands on his hips, Tsukki stares up at the lights. Unable to move, think, hear anything but echoing thunder. Boom. Boom. Boom

It's over. It's over. It's over.

Date: 2024-06-14 08:01 pm (UTC)
beautymarker: (pic#17156582)
From: [personal profile] beautymarker
[Oop, just when he thought he’d cried himself out for the time being! Having these two in particular give him such an automatic show of respect proves to be too much for Suga’s emotions; he claps a hand over his mouth and nods, tears streaming down his cheeks.]

I am so - so proud of you -
Edited Date: 2024-06-14 08:01 pm (UTC)

Date: 2024-06-15 01:33 am (UTC)
beautymarker: (pic#13963364)
From: [personal profile] beautymarker
[They spend one more night at the inn and while it’s nice to decompress and pull themselves back together somewhere other than the bus, it’s also torture. The place suddenly feels much too small for so many pacing, muttering, sighing, scowling, crying, overthinking boys, to the point that Suga keeps offering to run errands down to the konbini a few blocks away just to escape.

He considers asking Daichi or Tsukki to come along, but… of all the people lost in their own inner self-recriminations, those two are probably the worst off. They need time alone to untangle their snarled up thoughts.

When he’s headed for the bus the next morning, though, he’s surprised to be stopped by Yamaguchi and asked if maybe he’d like to sit with Tsukki for the ride home? Realization of just how much Yamaguchi must know crashes down on his shoulders and his face turns crimson, but he accepts the offer gratefully and does, in fact, walk right past Daichi to slide into the seat beside Tsukki instead.

As Ukai starts a head count, Suga quietly says:]


You really won the best friend jackpot, you know.

Date: 2024-06-15 07:12 pm (UTC)
beautymarker: (pic#13963383)
From: [personal profile] beautymarker
[It’s going to be a quiet ride home, Suga suspects. Nearly everyone spent their nights locked in their overactive minds, if the bleary faces lining the rows of their bus are anything to go by, and exhaustion is due to set in any time.

Suga’s not sure if he’s ready for collapse yet. The need to stay alert for the others, watch over them in this time of profound disappointment and grief, is doubly strong after he spent the day before giving in to his emotions at every turn.]


Oh no, I woke you up… sorry, Tsukki. [Those words ring in his head for a moment, combined with Tsukki telling him to shut up the day before, and he laughs to himself.] Good, because you definitely do.

[Sensei lets everyone know that they’re leaving, last chance for bathroom or anything else they’ve forgotten. Resounding silence greets the announcement and the bus pulls out.]

I’m not here to keep you from sleep, though, if that’s what you need right now. Okay?

Date: 2024-06-16 12:40 am (UTC)
beautymarker: (pic#13963364)
From: [personal profile] beautymarker
I don’t feel all that sleepy, to be honest… but I’ll keep it in mind.

[The eerie silence all around them already has Suga keeping his voice to a whisper, and when he looks around…]

Jeez, looks like everyone else is already knocked out. I’m glad.

Date: 2024-06-16 01:08 am (UTC)
beautymarker: (pic#13963378)
From: [personal profile] beautymarker
Narnia… [A lot of realms from childhood literature have similar names, so Suga has to reach back in his mind to make sure he fishes out the right one.]

With the four kids that find another world? And a lot of talking animals?

Date: 2024-06-16 01:21 am (UTC)
beautymarker: (pic#17164618)
From: [personal profile] beautymarker
Ah… that’s bleak.

[Suga frowns thoughtfully. After a long moment, he finally says:]

If you were Asahi, I’d punch you in the side right now.

Date: 2024-06-16 11:22 am (UTC)
beautymarker: (pic#17180711)
From: [personal profile] beautymarker
[Suga just laughs, one hand over his mouth to keep from getting too noisy.]

I'm not going to, don't worry. What you said does make sense. I keep thinking about how we're going to be like conquering heroes to so many people when we get back, and I'll constantly have this "but..." in the back of my head.

[Another thoughtful silence.]

... I was actually encouraged to retire from the team. By my teachers, my guidance counsellor... none of them understood why I'd stay when I'm not even a regular player and I have no plans of playing after high school. It would've felt so much better to come back as national champions, you know?

Date: 2024-06-16 11:48 am (UTC)
beautymarker: (pic#17164617)
From: [personal profile] beautymarker
[The genuine fury in Tsukki's response startles Suga, but only for a moment. Then it brings a slightly shaky smile to his lips.]

That's exactly what I would've wanted to hear if I had told anyone at the time.

[And imagine Tsukishima being the one to tell him so. Fondness floods Suga's heart without warning and, after another quick glance around the bus, he grabs one of Tsukki's hands to give it a little squeeze.

He shouldn't do things like that when Tsukki's still processing his confession. Blame it on the dissolution of his own filters.]

Date: 2024-06-16 12:06 pm (UTC)
beautymarker: (pic#17164903)
From: [personal profile] beautymarker
[Wow, did Suga's heart actually just try to jump all the way out of his chest?

Face suddenly red hot, Suga looks down at their hands, then back up at Tsukki, then straight ahead with a dopey smile on his face.

He's not asking questions. This is too nice to ruin with questions.]

Date: 2024-06-16 03:07 pm (UTC)
beautymarker: (Default)
From: [personal profile] beautymarker
[The image of Yamaguchi shaking the shit out of Tsukishima is so funny that Suga once again has to cover his mouth with his free hand to muffle a quick laugh.]

I’m glad. I’m really glad you’ve got him to guide you out of those times.

And he’s right. On top of that, no one can be a success and a winner and top of the class every time… trying and failing and appreciating the experience anyway is what makes you a person. I really believe this taught me more than cram school would’ve.

Date: 2024-06-16 10:40 pm (UTC)
beautymarker: (pic#17180292)
From: [personal profile] beautymarker
[Suga's brow furrows in thought.]

Why did I choose volleyball...? I knew I wanted to play a sport, but I can't remember why I ended up going with volleyball. [He waves it off with a little gesture.] Anyway. In middle school I was switched from opposite hitter to setter and got - exponentially better right away. Like, spiker really was not my position.

And when I got good, I got competitive. You know? It wasn't just a good way to keep fit and make friends, it was something I could really succeed at. By then we - my whole family, we'd really processed that Kenzo was one-in-a-millon gifted, and it meant a lot to me that I had my special talent too.

[He can't help but chuckle to himself at that. "Special talent" is overstating things when compared to Kenzo, which Kageyama showed him in no uncertain terms this year.]

I guess that's it, really. It's been my way to feel like I'm shooting for something extraordinary.
Edited Date: 2024-06-16 10:41 pm (UTC)

Date: 2024-06-17 12:48 am (UTC)
beautymarker: (pic#17164613)
From: [personal profile] beautymarker
Yeah, I guess that's right. If there was one "moment," it was probably the first time I played setter in a game we won - something clicked when I realized I'd found my place. That celebration felt different.

[That's still gradual, though, compared to a single moment in time like Tsukki's block.]

There have been some moments this year when I've really felt like my place still belonged to me, though. Those are more... singular.

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From: [personal profile] beautymarker - Date: 2024-06-17 09:57 pm (UTC) - Expand

it's like a clip show episode :')

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MEANWHILE

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